7 steps to express emotions to be loved

Feel happy by being loved. 7 steps to express and improve emotions
Expressing emotions makes communication smooth like lubrication oil. It is important to fully express emotions for smooth communication, but it is quite difficult.

How can you make your emotional expression plentiful? And what is disturbing it?

I will tell you the ways to express and train your emotions.

7 steps to express emotions to be loved


1.”Maybe it’s a kindness”

“I have a poor emotional expression. What should I do?” Many people ask this and there really are many reasons for poor expression.

The most common reason is that you are “too kind”.

You are caring about other people more than anything and holding back your emotion. Your “kindness” to think of others is possibly suppressing your emotions.

To prove it, some people frequently explode their emotions. Do you think they are kind? In most cases, the answer is no. After all, kindness leads to well-behaving and quietness and the expressions are suppressed.

Rather than thinking you are poor in emotional expression, think that you are a kind person instead.

Just thinking positively saves you from depression about your expressions.


2. Write a diary

One of the popular ways to improve emotions is “to write a composition”. 

You may have a memory of writing a book report in elementary school. It was a kind of practice for expressing emotions.

 Of course it is useful for adults, too. By including joy, anger, sadness, happiness or other emotions in your writing, you can have a great effect of training emotions.

 However it is bothering to write a composition as an adult. So instead, write a dairy. You don’t have to buy new diary for it.

 Prepare a thick notebook, and 3 to 5 lines of easy writing are good enough. It is a training of emotions, so instead of just writing what happened, mind the following.

 -Write about “happiness” and “anger” together

-Write about “joy” and “sadness” together

 Select one of them to begin with. You can choose either of them, or change day by day. An ideal is to include all 4 emotions in 3 to 5 lines of writing, but it is difficult in the beginning. Writing about opposite emotions together is an important thing.

 Just continuing this everyday will create a great sensation of emotions within you.


3. “I can’t feel emotion” is your misunderstanding

Another common distress among people who cannot express emotions well is “I was not impressed by the recommended movie” or “I could not understand what was good about the strongly recommended book”.

 This means, you can’t be touched by movies, books, or other pieces of work that most people were moved. As a result you think you have poor emotions.

 But think calmly. What is impressive depends on what that person likes. There are general opinions, but there are also many people who don’t belong there.

 I, myself, don’t have much interest in popular movies or novels. I like to be honest with my favorite works and enjoy them deeply. I’m often called odd.

 If you are not impressed by popular works, don’t worry.It is just you have not yet met best and favorite genre for you.

Don’t be hasty and gradually seek for your tastes. Genius is hiding among odd people.


4. Alexithymia is curable

“The lack of emotional expressions and imagination” is often curable by training the ways to express emotions, but it is difficult in some cases.

 Alexithymia was an idea known from 1970s, and known as one of the disorders. If your emotions don’t get any better by training, doubt the possibility of alexithymia.

 It was thought as a mental illness that cannot be cured in the past, but now there is a great possibility to get better.

 Alexithymia is not maladjusted to social environment. Instead, with an ability to see things objectively, it has a trait of adapting excessively to environment. 

Which means those with alexithymia are sensitive to recognize the difference between self and others, and it becomes a great stress. As a result, it often becomes a cause of depression.

 If you worry about why you cannot sense the feeling of yourself, or why you can’t feel any emotions, think about seeing a medical specialist. The early therapy saves you from complex treatment. 

Don’t worry. Alexithymia is curable, and better to start treatment before having  symptoms of depression.


5. Express your emotions by greetings and appreciation

There are many ways to train emotions, and one of the easy and popular ways is “greeting and appreciation”.

 For those who are not good at emotional expressions, “talking in a sinsong manner” or “struggle to say greetings and appreciations” are common cases. The way of talking requires a good amount of training, but greetings and appreciations are easier to practice.

 Be the first one to say “good morning!” or “hi!” to people at your office or school. It greatly improves your expression.

 One more thing, appreciation is also effective. The point is not to just say “thank you”, but say what you are appreciating for.

 For example, when your colleague helped your work, say “Thank you for your help. I can go home earlier because of you. Thank you very much”.

 Just saying “thank you” is easy. What is important for expressing emotions is to understand what or why you are thankful. That’s why it is important to say what you are appreciating for.

 By doing so, you can understand why you were happy, and you can feel the improvement in your expression of happiness.


6. Express the emotions of others

 Many people say they can’t properly express emotions, but one of the reason is that as a result of “kindness” they think too much about others. By giving priority to the feeling of others, they are hiding their own emotions.

This is not easy to overcome and “be more greedy” is not the easy advice for them.

 In this case, try to express the emotions of others. When people are talking about the pain of their job, make “painful face” for them. If they are talking funny stories, smile for them.

 Your emotions are not back yet, but others will think you are good at expressing emotions. This is enough to smooth the communication.


7. Explode

If you still don’t have any place to express emotions, try to put full of emotions aloud. Don’t be ashamed. “Laughter”, “anger”, “sadness”, “fun”, express these emotions to your limit.

 You will surely refresh. By expressing emotions, you are free from stress and feel refreshing.


Did you like my tips?


There are many ways to train your emotional expressions, and they will make your emotions plentiful.

On the other hands, there are such symptoms as alexithymia, so seeking for solutions in both training and medical treatment is important.

Emotions can be rich with training and treatment. Maybe you are not good now, but keep training step by step to communicate with people in bright smile.



7 steps to express emotions to be loved

1. “Maybe it’s a kindness”

2. Write a diary

3. “I can’t feel emotion” is your misunderstanding

4. Alexithymia is curable

5. Express your emotions by greetings and appreciation

6. Express the emotions of others

7. Explode 



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